Busy with. . .?!

Alhumdulillah Mashalllah I’m in such a yummy mood today.. so elated in a very elegant mood.. The Mother made her pleasant appearance at 9pm… I don’t exactly know what it was but today I was just sooo happy to see her, I spoke like I hadn’t seen her in ages. But wait I saw her on Sun. Maybe it was because, before she came I had came accross the following convo that I had 3 months back due to which I was still smiling and it refreshed unforgettable memories:

VP♥: Sohbat ki asr parti hai…..’Companionship has an effect on us.’ I truly believe that…. I want to say Jazakallahu Khairun fOr speaking to me….. Ur soo calm n. Sweet with all the words of wisdom, now wen I speak to others I too speak in this manner even more than b4, Yup no doubt it’s true…really it is, Oh & my friends I interact with also say the same. They also emulate my speaking & other ways…Glad they have a lyking to it as well. They say I’m a perfectionist & very perculiar in the manner I do everything… We have to learn things from the people we interact with, they shud be of benefit to us and we shud be of benefit to them. They always tell me to do things for them, they say, tell Veiled Princess to do it, she will get to the end of it, n complete it no matter what. I love helping people n taking their Duaas$, Alhumdulillah, Mashalllah!

…amm its a complex predicament…jee Alhumdulillah another day to thank Allah for all the bounties & all the wonderful ppl that make our day so colourful…& hope u well too…?

Oh noo… maybe I’ve tinsy bit lied to you… ok wait not lied but over exaggerated a little, when I say I cook so well.. today infact I made Fish & Chips. With corn on the side… Alhumdulillah, Mashalllah, It was really yummylicious…mummylilicious.. even my mom loved it.. Nana & Nani- who dont eat also ate… First time making it, and turned out well… there is a trick to cooking. Simple. Pray 2 Nafl, make Dua & try your best. Allah will never let you down. Trust me, try it out and you’ll nod in the affirmative.

So does this mean I’m ready to get married… just cuz I can cook?! Oh wait I can’t make round rotis, does that mean till they perfectly round can’t get married?!…. eish what nonsense.!! Whether rotis are round or the shape of the map of India (mines not that bad), when the time is right… got to get married. But got to try to perfect the cooking, then leave it to Allah. right?

Again I’m not busy getting married… Okie so where did I leave you all hanging yesterday in utmost suspense. Yea I realised that.

So yea when I was in Madressa in 2000, every Monday was Surah Memorization day. One Surah, from Surah Naas to Surahtul Fajr. Longer Surahs half each week. Now some girls it would he hard for them to memorize so they used to be absent both Mondays. And we do Surahs in a group so the whole group would go on & the girls not here would also join & go on with the flow.. which wasnt fair. But that’s how it was. However, at one point Mawlana realized & that’s when he said something to me. it always played in my mind. Thats what im busy with. He also told me this again when in my final exam I came 1st after being tested on Suratul Fajr-memorized-now a fav. Surah. He said:

“You should become a Haafidha!”

So as the years went by I was extremely busy with 1-Secular Education earning my High School Diploma along with 2-Alimah & 3-work or Teaching Madressa aswell. So absolutely no time. My schedule would be extremely tight. Early morning since Fajr, going to school, academics half day, Alimah for the rest half, then evening off to work or Madressa to teach, reach home feeling tired, doing homework etc and then hit the bed! This was mostly how my days would be spent. I couldn’t spare anytime on my watch.

I remember the one time my sister made me enter a Qirat Competion on the day of the competition and I won even though I memorized the Surah required in a mere 10mins while sitting in the testing class.

Oh you thinking I have a sharp memory.. nahh.. I’m soo bad with passwords. I just somehow never am able to remember them. It’s really bad especially with number locks or passwords on phones especially blackberry. Oh tell me about it you don’t even want to know I think 3x I had to:
‘Type “blackberry” to continue’
Aha, does that seem familiar… all 3x my phone wasn’t backed up and lost EVERYTHING!. Well it was really sad I also cried I mean come on phones like your life. But the last time it happened. I thought at night, tomorrow I’ll back it up. Maybe I never said Inshaallah. By morning somehow I couldn’t get in and it reset. I realized the reason why it happened is because maybe something must of been on there that wasn’t meant for me to be seen again. No point of lamenting.

After becoming Alimah I realized doing Hifz is much much more easier. Ok in general it’s easy and simple to memorize as it is the words of Allah. And Allah opens up your chest and helps you out. But I feel the hardest part is being able to retain it. Once you memorize you have to repeat and keep on reviewing it in order to always remember it.

My hearts desire was always to memories the entire Quran. When I was in South Africa in my final year of Alimah I managed to memorize a little. But never reviewed so ended up not knowing it proper. After I came back from S.A. I got busy with teaching for 3 yrs.. so now Alhumdulillah, after teaching Quran for about 7yrs on and off Allah gave me free time and the ability to memorize His Holy Quran.

So people and family are thinking that I’m just sitting home and wasting time making excuses of not getting married and of not teaching. When I tell them I’m memorizing the Holy book they just hurt my heart and my feelings by saying abrupt words of disencouragment. So now I don’t bother telling them. Leave them in their backwards mentality. So what if our female ancestors weren’t Hafidha!!

On the other hand somehow my mom found out & she was soo happy & she went on telling everyone. At one point I got fed up & stopped memorizing. And was only doing dour, till now.

In fact, as The Mother encouraged & motivated me & has mentioned the virtue about doing hifz & dying before completing it whilst trying to, Allah will resurrect amongst the Hafiz…

In todays time we’ve stooped soo low in the old days there was levels of knowledge. Nowadays there are levels of ignorance. I admire these people who are Hafidh & Hafidha of the Holy Quran. Even if today we can develope this within us that we start Envying  (Ghibta/ Rashq) the correct people than its a step in the right direction. Whether we inherit the deed or not, if Allah gives ability then we would be blessed.

Female Companions of Nabi (SAW), the Female pious Predecessors and so many people around us would vie with one another to learn more and more of Deen. So many of my friends are Hafidhas maybe over a dozen or even more… the virtues are soo much. There is no loss. So theres so much reason to continue. Yes ofcourse also its a great advantage if I were to marry & my hubby too is hafiz, then I’d be able to help out. If not then Inshaallah I can teach my kids and other kids.

I never noticed at 1st, I mean, jee I was and am very encouraged to do my Hifz. However, I’ve noticed it’s much more difficult to memorize, whereas reading a verse a handful amount of times I’d know it. So I thought & thought & I cried to Allah begging to remove the love of those things that are disliked by Him from my heart, and to show me the right way, and I guess this thought came in my mind.

Is there anything that we can focus on in our daily lives that can limit what we are caused to forget of the Qur’an or Ahadeeth?

Is there anything we can do every day that will open our heart and intellect and make them better receptacles for knowledge?

Thats when I realized & remembered… Imam ash-Shafi’i (RA) undoubtedly had a powerful memory. It is reported that he memorized al-Muwata from Imam Malik in a single day. However he began to sense a deficiency in his ability to memorize and retain information, so he asked his Shaykh, the famous Waki’ bin al-Jarrah about that. So this situation was turned into prose:

شَكَوْتُ إِلَى وَكِيعٍ سُوءَ حِفْظِي… فَأَرْشَنِي إِلَى تَرْكِ الْمَعَاصِي
I complained to Waki’ of a deficiency in my ability to memorize… So he instructed me to abandon sin
وَقَالَ بِأَنَّ الْعِلْمَ نُورٌ … وَنُورُ اللهِ لَا يُؤتَاهُ عَاصِي
And he said to me that knowledge is a light… And the light of Allah is not granted to a sinner.

I leave u with this msg of the Quraan.

Wala sawfa Yu’tika Rabbuka Fatarda. The dua of the person in need… Allah will respond…”And soon your Lord will give you that which you shall be happy/satisfied/ well pleased with.” (Q93:V5) 

P.S. Is there anything you can help with…? Yup. Make Duaa may Allah grant me lotz of strength to continue all the good & make me a Haafidha. Aameen..

May Allah forgive our past and may Allah give us the ability to never revert us onto our vice again. . . I cry, I yearn, I pine for this journey of my dream of becoming an Hafidha to be accepted. May Allah make it easy, Aameen.

Comment:
Shukran: http://nujoomulayl.wordpress.com/

Subhanallah – beautiful piece- May Allah accept all your efforts and make your journey easy- in this trying time of fitna and fasaad, it is a great boon to be able to learn or teach deen-Best time to memorize : after maghrib or tahajjud
Give 1 and a half pages of Sabaq consistently and insha Allah you will complete hifZ in 2 n a half years- give more you will finish earlier.
Abstain from sin as it makes memorization difficult- and previous works are quickly forgotten
Give lots of sadaqah
Shukran

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